-----

FOLLOWER ~a spider's scheme~
by
Jennifier D.

Disclaimers: All characters inside do not belong to me... [No! Kirito! 
Don't kill me! I know Aiji is yours!] but I really don't mind having 
Jun. Ne? *raises catnip with an evil grin*

tangled; even my web has caught myself
[a butterfly watching the spider struggle among whiteness]
-----



Part II.II:


Kirito sat up on his bed with a barely audible gasp. His fractured ribs 
still hurt, though the pain was slight and he could manage his daily 
tasks without aid. As for his right arm, it was now resting in a sling, 
but the doctor said it was possible for him to remove the cast by the 
next week.

It had been nearly two months already, and Aiji showed no signs of 
waking up from whatever endless dream he was trapped in. Kirito shivered in 
the cold winter wind, then got up form his bed to close the window. The 
window blinds flapping in the wind seemed to flutter and then went 
still like butterflies falling from the sky.

His butterfly. 

It didn't look as though Aiji was going to wake up anytime soon. But 
Kirito already knew, with a sinking feeling in his stomach, that Aiji was 
no longer a toy. He could no longer say that he couldn't love, because 
whatever he was doing now was out of love. He had been going back to 
the hospital on almost a daily basis, watching Aiji sleep on his bed 
peacefully, as though that the world could collapse around him and he 
wouldn't be affected. But Kirito knew, that should the sky collapse on Aiji, 
he would be there to hold it up.

He was scared. So afraid of the feeling rising from deep within his 
heart. It tore and pulled at him from different directions, and he knew 
that sooner or later, he had to make a decision. Whether he should 
acknowledge the feelings within, or to reject them.

"Oniisan?" Kohta stood at the doorway, rubbing his eyes sleepily. 
"What's the matter?"

The other members of Pierrot had offered to take shifts in order to 
rotate between taking care of Aiji and helping Kirito. Today was Kohta's 
turn, and although Kirito didn't want him around, he still felt sort of 
comforted by his presence.

Kirito shook his head, then wrapped his arms around himself. "I miss 
Aiji."

"That's natural." Kohta smiled, relieved by what Kirito said. For a 
moment, he was afraid that Kirito was going to say something, which he 
wouldn't have an answer to. "Of course you'll miss him. He's your 
boyfriend and he has been lying unconscious in the hospital for almost two 
months..."

"No. You won't understand." Kirito murmured softly.

"Oniisan..." The bassist walked over to Kirito's side, then placed a 
hand on his shoulder lightly. "You can talk to me if you want to... I may 
not be the best conversationalist around, but I can always offer a 
listening ear."

Kohta gave a small, sad smile. "Since young, we have never been close. 
You have always been running ahead of me, pursuing a dream which I 
couldn't see.  And I have always been chasing behind. Even now... after 
I've entered your world, I still can't see that dream you are pursuing."

Kirito turned to gaze at his brother quietly, his breath barely shaking 
in the cold room. The silence was so loud that he wanted to tear his 
ears off just to hear his own heart pump. Something inside him twisted 
painfully even as he decided to tell his brother what was on his mind. He 
knew that, the moment the truth left his mouth, he would no longer be 
able to turn back and refused to acknowledge it. He knew that, the 
moment those words left his mouth, he would have sealed his own fate.

He was trapped by his own game. A game he had set out to play with 
Aiji, to watch the guitarist floundering like a sightless butterfly that 
kept hitting itself against the closed windowpane in a vain attempt to 
get out. To watch him try to understand him even though he could never 
manage that in a million years.

He was just a toy.

Nobody could ever understand Kirito. Yet... nobody had ever loved him 
enough to sacrifice his own life as well. Nobody had ever showed him 
that it was possible to accept someone else totally, together with his 
flaws. Nobody had ever made him acknowledged the fact that humans... 
people he detested so strongly, were actually worth something in his world.

Nobody... except Aiji. 

And now, it was threatening to suck him into a foreign world, 
spiralling and unnatural with things he knew he could only understand in a 
lopsided manner. Kirito clenched his right hand tight, then raised his face 
to look at his brother, tears spilling down his face.

"Kohta..."

Kohta moved forward as though he wanted to hold his brother, but didn't 
dare.

"I'm in love with Aiji."


End: Part II.II


Date completed: 031101
Last revised: 151101

~to be continued~

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