tsmr-Ago, Now and Unknown
Ago, Now & Unknown


Part 2 – Ago [I]

Tick dot… tick dot… tick dot…

The sound from the clock was making Shinya sleepless but the main reason was… He walk quietly to the door and peek through the door hole, slowly and quietly again, he walks back to his bedroom. This time, he decides to call his lover for help although he really does not want to bother him.

“ Hello?” Someone answered the call.

Shinya held back his breath for a second before he speak out. “ Kaoru?”

“ Shinya? What’s up?”

This time, Shinya felt his heart beating fast, his face was crimson. He seldom speaks on the phone with his lover therefore; he felt some kind of uneasy calling him especially at this late hour. But…

“ Actually…” Shinya trying to figure up how he should said. “ Actually…”

“ …” Kaoru waited patiently for his lover to said.

“ You see, someone had been standing outside my door for about an hour and was still there.” Shinya finally said out. “ I was afraid…”

Without letting Shinya finishing his sentences, Kaoru interrupted. “ I’ll be there soon, wait for me and don’t open the door unless I told you to.”

Shinya obeyed and put down the phone right after Kaoru hang up. Suddenly, he felt so sweet in his heart for having such a caring lover who would dash over to him at this late hour when he needs help.

Six month, they had been together for six month but he was still so shy to tell Kaoru that he love him directly. He was still so shy to do what other lover is doing like kissing… but somehow, something seems to have missing up in their relationship and that’s why Shinya was holding back his feeling.

What is it…


Twenty minutes had passed.

Shinya peek through the door hole and the person was still there. He turns and looks at his watch wondering when Kaoru would arrival. Just then he heard a familiar voice…


Kaoru ran up the stairs and was losing his breath for dashing up eight stories. He steps up the corner and turn where he saw that ‘stranger’ outside his lover flat. He storm directly to the stranger.

“ What are you doing here at such late hour!”

The stranger seems to be frightened by Kaoru sudden approach, he seems to be so kind of anxious and tries to run away. Unexpected by the stranger, Kaoru reaction was faster than him whereby Kaoru had already pulled the stranger’s hand back. Just as both of them was losing their balance, the door of Shinya apartment opened.

“ AH…!” Both Kaoru and the stranger yelled when they fall into the house.

Shinya had tries to hold them but it was too late. Kaoru fell down first followed by the stranger landing on top of Kaoru placing a kiss on Kaoru’s lips. Shinya was upheaval of the sudden happening. Kaoru just stared at the stranger who was still on top of him. Now in the house, the light was bright enough to have a nice look at the stranger.

Kaoru was stun for a second when he has a clear view of the stranger. The stranger had blue hair, which suit him perfectly and… he was a prefect beauty! After recovering his viewing, Kaoru wonder why is this beauty doing here.

“ Are you two alright?” Shinya finally asked as the two was still lying on the floor staring at one another.

The stranger finally gets off Kaoru and stand up follow by Kaoru. Shinya was still eyeing his lover for staring at the stranger for such long time although he does admit that the stranger was gorgeous.

“ What are you doing outside?” Kaoru finally asked.

The stranger was nervous at first but seem that he decides to tell what’s going on. “ My name is Toshiya.” The stranger starts of with his name.

“ Toshiya?” Shinya seem to remember something.

“ Yes, I’m come to look for you.” Toshiya continue. “ Your mum or might as well say our mum should have told you.”

Kaoru interrupted. “ What do you mean your mum and Shinya mum?”

“ You’re my step brother!” Shinya finally remember Toshiya name.

“ Step brother?” Kaoru was confused. “ Then what are you doing outside for such long time?”

Toshiya giggle a bit. “ I’m embarrassed.”

Both Kaoru and Shinya sweatdrop! ^__^;

[Explanation: Toshiya’s father had re-married Shinya’s mother and so they became stepbrother. Now Toshiya will be living with Shinya as they were be attending the same university.]


One year after Toshiya live with Shinya and they were now attending the second years of university. Shinya and Kaoru were still together but it seem that nothing had change in their relationship. In the other hand, Kaoru and Toshiya shared the same interest of photography and were spending more time together. At the same time, the appearance of this particular person had make Kaoru realize his feeling for Toshiya.

The great DIE… He had start attending the university from the second year and was immediately attract by Toshiya. He joined the photography club because of Toshiya and there go the first battle of Kaoru and Die meeting.

“ What do you think you are doing!?” Kaoru exclaim. “ You didn’t join because you love photography, you telling me that you want to join because of Toshiya!?”

“ Yes! Is there anything wrong with it?” Die simply answers without looking at Kaoru and that make Kaoru’s blood boil. “ Anyway, I can take good photograph.”

Kaoru would have killed Die at that moment if Shinya and Toshiya had not stopped him. Later, Die still manage to join the club because he had won his bet with Kaoru that is by taking a photo that will be acknowledge by the consultant.

Well, right after Die joined the club, he had been wooing Toshiya from then which is longer than Kaoru although Kaoru get to know Toshiya earlier.

Back to Kaoru and Shinya relationship; one and a half year had passed and Shinya finally realize what wrong with their relationship. They seem to be more like friend than lover because the only one who seems to put in the effort was Shinya and not Kaoru. Shinya do admit that Kaoru had treated him well but it was just like the relationship of brother but he had notice the changes of Kaoru when Kaoru was with Toshiya, it was love that change Kaoru.

The change in Kaoru’s heart to Shinya was the day when Kaoru first see Toshiya. He does admit that Kaoru was nice enough for not dumping him for such long time. He knows Kaoru likes Toshiya but do Toshiya also love Kaoru?

Shinya love Kaoru and he want him to be happy. It will be nice if Toshiya also likes Kaoru he thought. Therefore, Shinya decides to help which he didn’t expect to make thing worse and nearly…

“ Do you like Kaoru?” Shinya asked the unprepared Toshiya.

Toshiya knows that Kaoru was Shinya’s lover and now Shinya was asking him whether he like Kaoru. To Toshiya, he did have feeling for Kaoru ever since they spend more and more time together. But now, Shinya seem to realize his feeling? Was he trying to remind me that Kaoru was his lover? Telling me to leave him further?

I know I shouldn’t fall for Kaoru.

“ What are you saying? Of course I don’t like Kaoru!”

This sentence was overheard by Kaoru; breaking his heart.

Thinking that Shinya is unhappy with him for hanging around Kaoru, Toshiya starts to avoid Kaoru. // Thinking what he had heard that day was truth, Kaoru did not look for Toshiya rather.

Toshiya had been looking unhappy recently and Die had noticed it. It was a prefect time for him to get Toshiya if he tries hard, he thought.

Kaoru feeling moody all day, he keeps on remembering what Toshiya had said. He was upset when he see how close Die and Toshiya had become and that make him believe what Toshiya said is truth about Toshiya does not like him because the one he like was Die. Most of all, Kaoru could not tell Toshiya how he feel because he have Shinya.

Shinya notice Kaoru was unhappy and the reason was also clear. He didn’t expect Toshiya would say that because he always thinks Kaoru and Toshiya love each other. The worse matter now was that there is Die coming between Kaoru and Toshiya.

Toshiya was trying hard to forget Kaoru and forcing himself to accept Die. Many times, he thinks he can do it but he can’t. He can see the sincere in Die but his heart was with Kaoru, he cannot lie to Die.

Bitter feeling…

Their relationship went on like this for another year. The last year of university, it will be the last chance if ‘he’ wants to be happy.

To Die, he will be happy if Toshiya could accept him. Kaoru, he will be happy if he can be with Toshiya. Toshiya will be happy if Kaoru is with him. Shinya will be happy if Kaoru will love him but he knows his wish will have no future.

What will future be like? Sweet … bitter … unknown…

TBC… Part 3 – Ago [II]


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