mei-k(becks)-My Destiny, My Destination
My Destiny, My Destination
by Mei-k(Becks)

 

Chapter 12


"ARIGATOU HOKKAIDO!!!"

Evening of 18th May, 1998. A fine evening.
It was a concert in Hokkaido. Whenever we guys hold concerts there, we feel extraordinarily excited. Perhaps it's due to the strong feeling of 'home'.

Same for tonight. Everyone was really high. People on the stage, behind the stage, the audiences, all were enjoying themselves.

He was one of them. He was not always that hyper, even a little too hyper that day I believe. He was jumping around while playing the guitar, making girls yell their lungs out.

I smiled to myself.
Only when we were on stage I could look at him, adore him so directly. I had no doubts that he was the greatest guitarist I knew. He had the natural power of attracting everyone's eyes, with his talents and charm.
And to me, there was something more...
He was the guy that I had loved.

Ever since that day we "officially" clarified our relationship, we hadn't really talked face to face privately. We didn't show our embarrassment in front of the others, of course. But whenever we were alone, we were acting like strangers. Except things about our work, I didn't know what else to say to him, and I don't think he wanted to bother speaking to me as well.

~

"HISA!!!"

Takuro's sudden shout pulled me back to my senses. Only then I noticed how loudly the girls were screaming, and he was sitting on the floor.

I gasped in shock and dashed to him immediately. Other staffs started to gather around, trying to help him up.

"No I can't... I think I've broken my leg..."

He winced in pain as he failed in standing up.

I was too shocked to do anything when the staff helped him to the backstage. I was told to keep the audiences calm, but I was too anxious myself.

I said something to the audiences, but I was too scared to remember what I actually said. "How's he", "Is he gonna be alright" were the only things in my head.

At that moment I really wished I could dash to the backstage and check him up, but my responsibility was there, right on the stage. That instance I felt so helpless that I wanted to cry. I was left alone, facing that group of worried people. They kept asking me if he was okay, and I kept telling them "yes", "please don't worry". They seemed to have accepted my answers, yet I couldn't convince myself.

"Minna-san, please don't worry. Hisashi's really okay but I'm really sorry that our concert has to end here. I'm really sorry for..."

I didn't wait until Takuro finished his sentence when I ran to the backstage, looking for him. I know it was not a right thing to do but I was too messed up to think.

There I saw him, sitting in a corner, on the wheelchair the staff borrowed from the first-aid department of the stadium. Other people had gone for their duties, leaving only a girl with him, pressing a pack of ice against his leg.
He was closing his eyes as he puffed his cigarette furiously. From his slightly shivering hand I could tell how bad he was feeling.
I gestured to the staff that she could leave him to me. She nodded and handed me the pack of ice, then hurried for her duties as well, leaving us quietly at the corner.

I touched his swollen area gently, feeling a terrible pain in my heart as if I had broken my own leg. I sighed, then pressed the ice pack against it.
He heard my sigh and opened his eyes, obviously surprised that I was there.

"You okay?"

I asked, my lips trembling a bit. At the sight of his eyes I suddenly realized what I had been doing.
I wanted to withdraw my hands but it was too late. No one was around so I had no choice but continue my task.

He didn't reply but stared at me quietly. That means "yes".

"How come you're always that careless... It seems ever since I met you I've been treating your injuries..."

Silence.

I knew I had said something I shouldn't. The air around us seemed to have become so heavy that we could hardly breathe.

"Hisashi-san! The ambulance is here!!"

The voice of a staff saved us from the embarrassing situation. I moved away and watched silently as he was pushed away.

What were we? Friends? Enemies? I questioned myself again and again, but I couldn't find the answer. I didn't even know if I hate him or not. I only knew the sight of him made my heart whimper - the blank, lonely expression that cut deeply into my heart...
 

 


~to be continued~
 

to part 13

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